"My Life with Domestic Violence"

Here is my story. I hope it helps other victims. I am very honored to do this.

Hello my name is Adriana and I have been a victim of Domestic Violence several times. Here’s my story.

It all started when I met Ronald, I lived with roommates while me and Ronald were dating. He moved in with me and things were good till one day when I got home from work. Ronald was upset about something and would not talk to me, he yelled at me and when I would yell at him, he would slap me in the face or arm. When I tried to run he would slam me against a wall with his hand around my neck.

All I could think was that he was going to kill me so I begged him to stop; he let go of me and left. We talked and he said he wouldn’t do it again. I believed him. A couple months went by and the hitting started up again, so I decided the only way to get him to stop was call the police. He would get arrested and blame me that is my fault time after time. Ronald would get released and he would tell me that he would change, I believed him. A month would go by and then the hitting would start again. I tried so hard to just keep the hitting and punishing to myself without the police but I was told he would keep doing it if I didn’t stop it.

The very last time that Ronald hit me, I called the police and he was taken to jail, he got sentenced to 6 months in jail with a No Contact Order. So there was no way for us to talk. So I went on believing that it was my fault he was in jail and that I should have never called the police.

My roommate beat me violently. I thought my world was over and I got depressed and blamed myself for being beat and I believed that I deserved it.

Two weeks later I found out I was pregnant; I went to the judge and asked for him to release the no contact order. The Judge said that Ronald needed to learn his lesson that hitting and beating me wasn’t going to happen ever again, that I needed to look out for the safety of me and my child.

I lost my apartment and moved in with Ronald’s parents. Through the whole pregnancy Ronald was in jail and the judge would not release him. Ronald got out four weeks after our daughter was born and seemed to have changed. We talked and it came to the point that Ronald wasn’t taking his medication and that he had anger issues. He said that he was sorry and I said that I could not forgive him; he had to prove to me that he has changed. We got married on August 25, 2007.

Ever since Ronald got released from jail, Ronald has changed so much. He has taken the Victim’s Impact Panel; he went to counseling and is taking his medication on a regular basis. He has not raised his hand or his voice at me or any one else. Ronald is calmer now; he has been able to channel his anger to drawing or going for walks or talking with someone. Our relationship is much stronger and we are able to deal with life’s hard ships.

We have grown to trust each other and I know that I will never have to be a victim of Domestic violence again. The Victim’s Impact Panel has helped Ronald with recognizing what he did in the past and what he can do differently and has inspired him to talk to others to try and help them. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. You have helped Ronald and us in every way, now we would like to help.

There is always someone to help when it comes to Domestic Violence please don’t be afraid to get help if you are the abuser or the victim, get help!!! It will help in the long run!!!!!!!!!!!

Sincerely,
Adriana